Dark and Cold

What is the worst part about the holidays? Ask just about anyone and they will tell you the same thing. Now that the holiday season is over, there's nothing else to look forward to, it's just dark and cold.

Actually, the 'ber months have always been my favorite of the entire year, even when I was a kid. The beautiful sunsets as I am driving home from work, the crispness in the air, changing leaves, and of course, football. We celebrate spooky season with glowing pumpkins, scary movies, and trick-or-treating. In November we are grateful for all that we have, and simultaneously look forward to gathering with family for turkey and pumpkin pie while at the same time dreading...well, gathering with family. The day after Thanksgiving we go guns a-blazing into the Christmas season, our kitchens overflowing with Christmas goodies, our living rooms looking like someone vomited joy everywhere (as it should!), and while our waistlines grow, our bank accounts shrink. Exponentially. Paying rent is overrated anyway, right?

So last night, it all culminated in an epic New Year's Eve celebration with my firstborn, my two granddaughters, and, believe it or not, my ex-husband. Grilling burgers outside, introducing the girls to Jiffy Pop popcorn, watching the father of my children be the best grandpa ever, and sitting with nothing but tree lights and two sleeping toddlers while we watch the ball drop (and Anderson Cooper completely hammered on CNN - an added bonus).

So now what?! For some reason society at large has decided that January 1 is the time to start anew. Make resolutions - to eat healthier, exercise, set boundaries for their mental health, cook more. They feel compelled to yank down the decorations the day after Christmas (and sometimes on Christmas Night - who are these freaks?). Valentine's merchandise is all over the stores and in some cases even Spring and Easter. I mean....DAMN, Hobby Lobby! Slow your roll!

2025 was nothing short of a nightmare for this family. My son got divorced and had to move 8 hours away from the two most important people in his life. I took it so hard my doctor had to take me out of work for a week. My aunt, who I became super close with twenty years ago when we were dealing with her mother (my beloved grandmother) as she battled vascular dementia. is now facing it herself. To add salt to the wound, she went to the ED with elevated blood pressure, was given medication and unceremoniously sent home, only to have a stroke that night. Now she is declining steadily and it is breaking all our hearts. I also spent a year in my old apartment with people upstairs selling and doing drugs; months of phone calls to the police and the HOA with no one listening to me until someone actually overdosed in the apartment. Followed closely by a death in the next building where the poor soul wasn't found until someone reported a smell.

My son moved in with me over the summer, and FINALLY, the stars aligned and we were able to get a larger home in a beautiful secluded neighborhood. I went from one bedroom and one bath with drug dealers outside, peeling paint, and loud neighbors to a two bedroom, two and a half bath town home with a wood-burning fireplace, a private patio, and a pool. If there IS noise outside, it's the rustling of the trees and the chirping of the birds. And my favorite? The sound of a train whistle in the distance at night.......ESPECIALLY in those 'ber months.

I'm so much happier and calmer in my new environment, that if I am starting any new habits, it will be the habit of embracing the fact that January isn't a time of renewal and new beginnings, it is a time to settle in and embrace the heart of winter. Yes, the decorations will come down this weekend, not because the season is over, but to make room for the season of winter. Your home is no longer about being festive like it was in December, it's about embracing everything Winter. The cold and the dark, the rest our bodies crave after the craziness of the last few months, comfort foods and the comfort of the ones we love (including the furry ones, who tend to be the best snugglers).

So, as I now sit here on the first Sunday of January, wrapping up this "inaugural" blog of 2026, here is my unsolicited advice. Slow down. Hibernate. Wrap yourself in the warm blankets of winter and enjoy the quiet. Read books by the fire, make soup in the crock pot, pamper your winter skin. That gym membership that you're going to pay for for three years and only use once will still be there on March 21. You may think you're going to set your alarm thirty minutes earlier so that you can slow down your mornings, but trust me, you're only going to be pressing snooze three more times than you were before.....because it's still dark at seven am! New Year's Resolutions are empty promises we make to ourselves during the excitement of the holiday season and abandon by mid-January. Give yourself grace. Take this time to figure out what it REALLY is you want to accomplish in 2026. I would venture to guess that your personal goals will look a lot different when the daffodils are blooming than they did on December 31.